damn again - me and men

Today I was off. I had scratched my eye on monday morning and it was beet red. I didnt know anything about it until someone told me at work. And as the day went on it got worst. So I decided to stay home so it came get better and I can work a lil more productive. But that is not the reason for the blog. I just need an opening statement. Well I was on the way bus on the way home. I saw this cute ass younging on the bus. But truly when is there not a cutie on the bus. LOL well I was looking at ugly betty on my ipod. Yeah trying to get into something new. So as I was watching it. I felt someone just staring at me. So I looked up and it was the cutie that i saw get one the bus. Well when dudes start to check me out I get nervous and start to play with my tongue ring. Why I don't know. I think it is the impulse of what am I gonna say if dude approaches me. Well I began to check him out also. The bus was crowded but I didnt want anyone to know my business. So I do the usual I just smile and smerk it off. Just as things started to heat up my stop comes and I get off. Hoping he would get off with me, but he didnt. I waved at him but he stayed on the bus. Now I am sitting here thinking once again I fucked up. I dont know why it is so hard for me to talk to dudes. I just fumble well only if they are really interested in me and I am interested in them. I think if i would have talked to him and he said someting that caught my eye i would have stayed on the bus. But once again I didnt. I get so fustrated with myself when this happens and it has happened so many times. I just pray that I see them again but i usually dont. I really need to step up my game or I am gonna be single for the rest of my life. Not to say that every dude I meet i want him to be my man or my boytoy, but jezz the single life sucks. Well at times. LOL Yeah I like my freedom, but sometimes being tied down to the one you love would be great. I have been there only once, well one really good one. I am sitting here still stuck on this. I just wish it would go away like the other times.

astrological signs

Everyone has there weakness, some say its food, some say it money, some say just life has then so weak, but for me it is an Aquarius. I have this thing for Aquarius men. Every dude that I have been attracted to turns out to be an Aquarius. I don't know what they do, but for some reason I can understand them. Well not all one Aquarius I couldn't understand and now looking back on it i am so glad I didn't. I was in a serious relationship with an Aquarius for 7 years he taught me everything, another one for 2 years that one was a disaster, and others dudes i have dated or hung out but nothing came of it. For me that Aquarius charm gets me. There swagger, there confidence, charm, and there sensuality gets to me. Mostly there senusality. They can touch you and put a spell on you that will have you so drawn into them. I dont know how they do it they just do. Or maybe they just know my weak spots. lol For me I am a pisces through and through. I am one of those love pisces. I am very romantic, chill, quiet stay to myself type person. And that meshes very well with an aquarius. Now they do have there down side. The one thing I dont like about a pisces is the trust issues that they hold. I thought I was bad but they got me beat in that area. It is very hard for aquarius's to trust anyone they get involved with weither it be friend or lover especially if they like or love you. One thing I can say about them they dance to there own song. Meaning they gonna do what they want. At one point both my sisters and I each dated an aquarius at the same time. We would all complain about the same thing. How untrusting they are. I know that is putting them all in the same barrel but shit if they all fit put em in there. I have asked aquarius's why they have trust issues and they say it is not trust it is jealousy, but we never admit that we are that. I just laughed and I understood also.